Shhhh, it was supposed to be a SECRET, Booz Allen Hamilton!
“With the American flag fanny pack you can easily carry around all of your valuables on your person safely while still having the freedom and convenience of both hands! Nothing says “I love my country and multi tasking” like this amazing fanny pack!!!” - A customer on Amazon.com
“I regret everything.” - Betsy Ross, in heaven
Happy Flag Day!
Photos via OnePiece USA, Ethan Miller/Getty Images News/Getty Images, KMazur/WireImage/Getty Images, New Bride Co. at Etsy, Amazon.com, and Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images News/Getty Images
I do intend to run for president… of the Tim Tebow fan club.
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Makes sense. They both got eliminated from the playoffs at the about the same time. |
The box score for the 52nd annual Congressional Baseball Game:
- Republicans: 0 runs, 3 hits, 5 errors
- Democrats: 22 runs, 24 hits, 0 errors
One more loss like this and Rep. Darrell Issa (R-CA) will lead an investigation into ‘roids in congressional baseball.
Photos by Bill Clark/CQ-Roll Call/Getty Images
This week in the adventures of 90-year-old congressman Ralph Hall (R-TX):
- Hall walked into an LGBT Pride Reception on Capitol Hill.
- By all accounts, he had a good time and made polite conversation.
- Until he realized this reception was a gay thing: “At that moment I realized that this was not the reception I intended to attend, and I put down my glass, thanked the sponsor, and told him we would be leaving.”
A convenient story, Rep. Hall!
From the other side of the aisle I hear the conversation being about ‘free this is free, we need to take it and it’s free and we need to do it now’ and that’s sort of the fundamental message that my brain receives. Now, my brain being a man’s brain sort of thinks differently, because I say, well, it’s not if it’s free is it really free because I say in my brain there’s a cost to this.
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Our thoughts are with Rep. Steve King (R-IA) in this difficult hour. Having your office visited by college kids holding menacing an umbrella looks utterly terrifying.
Photo via @maricelaguilar
Things could be going better for your PR department when it has to issue a statement like this:
We want to assure our fans that HGTV is proud of the American flag and everything it symbolizes for our people.
Oh lord, how could HGTV possibly offend flag-lovers? Did they suggest that an actual flag be used as a tablecloth for a festive July 4th table-scape? Were they REALLY excited about nylon flags because “spills can be easily wiped off and the flag can later be hung with pride on a flag pole”?
Uh, yes. That is exactly what happened, and people are angry. How can patriots explain that splotch of mayo next to the fifty stars? “Uh, DC got statehood!” “That’s Puerto Rico!” “It’s just a freedom stain!”
In the future, HGTV, please remember that American flags are appropriately used as 1) scarfs, 2) capes, 3) ponchos, but never, ever, as tablecloths.
Photos via HGTV and Mark Wilson/Getty Images News, Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call Group, and Jame McCarthy/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
Before, my friends on the left side of the aisle here tried to make rape and incest the subject — because, you know, the incidence of rape resulting in pregnancy are very low.
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Dude, remember the last election? the pro-rape vote is not NEARLY as big as you think it is. |
Happy birthday, President Bush*!
Those patriotic socks are totally working for you.
(*the good one.)
Photo of incoming Texans cheerleaders with the former president by @KPRCkeithg.
