The Romney family’s long-term strategy of replacing today’s voters with a brood of telegenic Republicans is proceeding as planned.
The plan is going so well, Mitt Romney now refers to his grandkids by number.

The Romney family’s long-term strategy of replacing today’s voters with a brood of telegenic Republicans is proceeding as planned.

The plan is going so well, Mitt Romney now refers to his grandkids by number.

Somehow Paul “regular hunting bro” Ryan has managed to raise over a million bucks in the last fundraising quarter.
And what do you know? $5,200 of that money came from his old buddy Mitt Romney.
But according to the disclosures, Mitt’s fallen on hard times. His occupation is listed as “not employed,” probably because “womp womp” isn’t a job category.

Somehow Paul “regular hunting bro” Ryan has managed to raise over a million bucks in the last fundraising quarter.

And what do you know? $5,200 of that money came from his old buddy Mitt Romney.

But according to the disclosures, Mitt’s fallen on hard times. His occupation is listed as “not employed,” probably because “womp womp” isn’t a job category.

I can tell you the hurricane didn’t come at the right time.

Mitt Romney on Sandy.

Long may we remember the way Hurricane Sandy ravaged the Mitt Romney campaign.

Still mad about President Obama’s re-election? For only $15.35, you can buy your way into an alternate sci-fi universe where Spock has a beard Mitt Romney is president.
Read all about it in “Romney Readiness Project: Retrospective & Lessons Learned,” a 139-page report in which Willard’s transition team describes their plans for the Romney Administration. Spoiler alert: the Romney Administration would be a lot like listening to a management consultant give a PowerPoint presentation on brand synergy in a hot and crowded conference room. For four to eight years.
Highlights of the report include the statement “the White House staff is similar to a holding company,” the promise of “flow charts” for all departments to achieve “unity,” and plans for corporate management-consulting seminars.
Nothing on handshakefulness, though. Maybe that’s where the campaign went wrong. 
Photo by Jewel Samad/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Still mad about President Obama’s re-election? For only $15.35, you can buy your way into an alternate sci-fi universe where Spock has a beard Mitt Romney is president.

Read all about it in “Romney Readiness Project: Retrospective & Lessons Learned,” a 139-page report in which Willard’s transition team describes their plans for the Romney Administration. Spoiler alert: the Romney Administration would be a lot like listening to a management consultant give a PowerPoint presentation on brand synergy in a hot and crowded conference room. For four to eight years.

Highlights of the report include the statement “the White House staff is similar to a holding company,” the promise of “flow charts” for all departments to achieve “unity,” and plans for corporate management-consulting seminars.

Nothing on handshakefulness, though. Maybe that’s where the campaign went wrong. 

Photo by Jewel Samad/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Gayle King: “Can we say Mitt Romney is a stable boy?”
Ann Romney: “Yes, he’s really good at that.”
 

Gayle King: “Can we say Mitt Romney is a stable boy?”

Ann Romney: “Yes, he’s really good at that.”

 

Mitt Romney appeared like a kid who showed up for his science project and the teacher said, ‘Explain it,’ and Mitt couldn’t do it. His ‘dad,’ Paul Ryan, explained it to him, but Mitt didn’t get it… That’s why we lost the last election.

- Rep. Pete Sessions (R-TX), on why Mitt Romney lost the election.

No, Mitt Romney lost because he was the kid who insisted that 47% of the science fair geeks had their model volcanoes made by the government.

Some people could marry but choose to take more time, they say, for themselves….They’re going to miss so much of living, I’m afraid. If you meet a person you love, get married. Have a quiver full of kids if you can.

Mitt Romney, giving the commencement address at Southern Virginia University.

Quiverfull is a pretty controversial religious movement that eschews all forms of birth control, so that’s a touchy reference.

Can’t we just have a binder full of kids?

Curiously, the speaker list for Mitt Romney’s $5K/plate retreat in Utah this June includes David Axelrod.*
Either the Obama campaign adviser defected, or he wants to add insult to injury by dropping Mitt in the trust fall exercise.
Photo by Emmanuel Dunand/Getty Images
* Not curiously, Mitt Romney thinks five thousand dollars is a reasonable price for food.

Curiously, the speaker list for Mitt Romney’s $5K/plate retreat in Utah this June includes David Axelrod.*

Either the Obama campaign adviser defected, or he wants to add insult to injury by dropping Mitt in the trust fall exercise.

Photo by Emmanuel Dunand/Getty Images

* Not curiously, Mitt Romney thinks five thousand dollars is a reasonable price for food.