Look at these people destroying the sanctity of Rush Limbaugh’s marriages!

Photos by Mark Wilson/Win McNamee/Getty Images News/Getty Images and via @KellyO

What does the Supreme Court’s Prop 8 decision mean?
Same-sex marriage is legal again in California! Yay, beach weddings!
BUT it’s only legal because the Supreme Court decided that Proposition 8 supporters didn’t have the right to sue after California struck down the law. SCOTUS declined to rule on whether or not these people are d-bags.
It was a 5-4 decision that fell along lines legal scholars might describe as “?!” Roberts, Scalia, Ginsburg, Breyer and Kagan were in the majority. Kennedy,Thomas, Alito and Sotomayor gave the minority opinion. Yes, this lineup is as uncomfortable for them as it is for you.
Same-sex marriage isn’t going to become automatically legal outside California, despite this and the earlier DOMA ruling—but California’s same-sex couples can marry, and couples in other states where same-sex marriage is legal will have new federal protections. Who’s psyched for tax time next year?
San Francisco’s colorful Pride Parade is about to get a lot more boring. Soon it’ll just be a bunch of married couples arguing over whose turn it is to take out the trash when they get home.
As before, if you are straight and married, nobody is going to destroy your marriage, unless your spouse has an affair. Even then, maybe you could try counseling.
Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images News/Getty Images

What does the Supreme Court’s Prop 8 decision mean?

  • Same-sex marriage is legal again in California! Yay, beach weddings!
  • BUT it’s only legal because the Supreme Court decided that Proposition 8 supporters didn’t have the right to sue after California struck down the law. SCOTUS declined to rule on whether or not these people are d-bags.
  • It was a 5-4 decision that fell along lines legal scholars might describe as “?!” Roberts, Scalia, Ginsburg, Breyer and Kagan were in the majority. Kennedy,Thomas, Alito and Sotomayor gave the minority opinion. Yes, this lineup is as uncomfortable for them as it is for you.
  • Same-sex marriage isn’t going to become automatically legal outside California, despite this and the earlier DOMA ruling—but California’s same-sex couples can marry, and couples in other states where same-sex marriage is legal will have new federal protections. Who’s psyched for tax time next year?
  • San Francisco’s colorful Pride Parade is about to get a lot more boring. Soon it’ll just be a bunch of married couples arguing over whose turn it is to take out the trash when they get home.
  • As before, if you are straight and married, nobody is going to destroy your marriage, unless your spouse has an affair. Even then, maybe you could try counseling.

Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images News/Getty Images

In the case of Media Interns v. Supreme Court’s Procedures for Releasing Decisions, we are all winners.

Photos by Win McNamee/Getty Images News/Getty Images

barticles:

- Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito clarifies the value of the board game Clue in contemporary jurisprudence.
(From the dissent in Descamps v. United States)

Okay, okay, but Sorry! still provides accurate legal guidance, right?

barticles:

- Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito clarifies the value of the board game Clue in contemporary jurisprudence.

(From the dissent in Descamps v. United States)

Okay, okay, but Sorry! still provides accurate legal guidance, right?

You know, I’m, I guess, of a generation that I don’t — I wonder — I listened to some of the Supreme Court justices and one of them said, ‘Well what’s next after that? Is it two people, three people?’

Don Rumsfeld, suggesting gay marriage has weapons of mass polygamy. 

Good thing you can’t invade gay marriage.

Tuesday’s Links: War Games

image

* A compromise for Justice Scalia.

* Unless you’re playing cards, war isn’t a game.

* Put this in your baby scrapbook, space nerds!

* Think your privacy is violated now? Just you wait.

* Invest in this U.S. export and you’ll be laughing all the way to the bank.

* Re-enacting a Sex Pistols interview as Amish folk is exactly as hilarious as it sounds.

* Sure, you see them on the internet all the time, but what is the science behind them?

5 Great Same-Sex Marriage Moments in Comedy

Patton Oswalt took on same-sex marriage long before the Supreme Court ever did.

Click through for same-sex marriage hilarity from Garfunkel & Oates, Eugene Mirman and more.

Read More

It’s a big week at the Supreme Court, as the justices hear arguments about whether gays should be allowed to ruin marriage for the rest of us (by booking all the good wedding caterers) or if California’s Proposition 8, which bans same-sex marriage, should be allowed to stand.
The anti-gay Family Research Council isn’t taking any chances. They’ve unveiled a new strategy just in time for Tuesday’s argument: pray that God turn pro-equality lawyers into blathering idiots. Here’s the recommended text for the FRC’s “prayer teams:”

May those arguing on behalf of same-sex “marriage” present their arguments in an inept, confusing and unconvincing way. May they fail to gain traction in the minds of the Justices. May the right of Californians to amend their state constitution to protect marriage be confirmed by the Court, and may the Defense of Marriage Act be ruled constitutional (Lev 20:all; 1 Sam 2:8-10; 2 Chr 14:11; 20:12-27; Pr 22:28; 24:21; Is 8:18-20; Dan 7:25-27; 2 Cor 2:5)

This is so frustrating. Been looking at my copy of the U.S. Constitution for hours and still can’t find any of those sections they footnoted.
Photo by Max Whittaker/Getty Images News/Getty Images

It’s a big week at the Supreme Court, as the justices hear arguments about whether gays should be allowed to ruin marriage for the rest of us (by booking all the good wedding caterers) or if California’s Proposition 8, which bans same-sex marriage, should be allowed to stand.

The anti-gay Family Research Council isn’t taking any chances. They’ve unveiled a new strategy just in time for Tuesday’s argument: pray that God turn pro-equality lawyers into blathering idiots. Here’s the recommended text for the FRC’s “prayer teams:”

May those arguing on behalf of same-sex “marriage” present their arguments in an inept, confusing and unconvincing way. May they fail to gain traction in the minds of the Justices. May the right of Californians to amend their state constitution to protect marriage be confirmed by the Court, and may the Defense of Marriage Act be ruled constitutional (Lev 20:all; 1 Sam 2:8-10; 2 Chr 14:11; 20:12-27; Pr 22:28; 24:21; Is 8:18-20; Dan 7:25-27; 2 Cor 2:5)

This is so frustrating. Been looking at my copy of the U.S. Constitution for hours and still can’t find any of those sections they footnoted.

Photo by Max Whittaker/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Meet Packy, the little health care law that could.
It’s another Indecision storybook, right this way.

Meet Packy, the little health care law that could.

It’s another Indecision storybook, right this way.